Jean Burman

Highway to Hell

Cartoon Pen & Watercolour 8″ x 12″

Copyright 2008 Jean Burman

My good friend Elinor Mac emailed me from Scotland this week.    It’s always such a treat to open my inbox to find her there.  She always has something entertaining to tell me… or to forward… and the other day was no exception!

After reading her email… a quick google search confirmed the terrible truth.

According to a report in The Scotsman… police caught and charged a man with drink driving whilst six times over the legal limit at the wheel of his motorised wheelchair… (the fact that he was also asleep at the lights in the turning lane on a busy four lane highway probably added to their ire and brought the essential element of “circus” to the news story!)

Where?  A little red faced I confess this happened in downtown Cairns.  My town.  Half way around the world from Tignabraich Scotland.  In fact… if you were to fly for 24 hours in a straight line from pretty much anywhere on the planet you would eventually get… well… here.

Newsworthy yes… and indeed the incident did make front page news here too.  But what surprised me the most was that the Scottish newspaper was not the only one onto it.  India news… Hinduonline… Congo news… Reuters… even the NYTimes and the Huffington Post all got a hold of this one.  And in a matter of earthshattering minutes too.  Breaking news of the weirdest kind (apparently) travels fast.  I gave up counting at page 9 on Google for the news sources carrying this story!

Why there hasn’t been such a commotion online or off since that bloke up in the Top End was bitten on his Rear End by a taipan… as he crouched for a comfort stop by the side of an outback road in the Northern Territory.  Front page world news for over a week… but that was more than 3 weeks ago!

Amazing how quirky news travels fast… but why the fascination with such things when there is so much other “serious” stuff going on out there?  But I guess that’s the point isn’t it?   Where on earth would we be without a good laugh… especially when we get the chance to laugh at ourselves!  ( ~grin~)

I have no idea what the rest of the world must think of this place where we 20 million odd Aussies live (odd being the operative word here ~still grinning~)  This vast brown land all green around the edges just gets more entertaining by the minute!

Kangaroos bounding around our streets (oh yeah right)… crocodiles on the beaches (uhuh?)… snakes in places you could never imagine (well okay maybe)… should all make for one of the most exciting tourist destinations on the planet.  So “where the bloody hell are they?”  (to caption the late great ill-fated tourism ad campaign that crashed and burned)

Visitor numbers are down…. and can you blame them with all this crazy stuff going on?  I mean… “why the bloody hell would they?” *wink*

But no… it’s not the front page news of reckless runaway motorised wheelchairs or the belligerence of our (oooo scarey) wildlife that has tourists running scared.

Nope.  It’s all that rather stupid trivial stuff on page 3 that’s got them all stumped (and staying home).  Incidentals… like the burgeoning cost of fuel… the world economic crisis… political social and religious unrest across the planet… terrorism… war in the middle east…and the threat of climate change… jihad and global catastrophe.

Tsshhh… details details…

Oh come on over… she’ll be right mate!  (((chuckles)))

If  we should ever need to be reminded of how quickly time passes… look no further than a garden.  What a difference a day makes there!   One day a bud… the next… a flower.

It’s rapid.  And unforgiving.  Ants already encircle the delicate blooms.

So… without thought for the future or what might be… I resolve to simply enjoy the blossoms now.  Today.  As though tomorrow does not exist.  I breathe the scent that evokes the memories of childhood… passionfruit and jasmine… and of places real and imagined.   I close my eyes.  I am a child again.  Long ago and very far away… the fragrance of another time.   Scattered frangipani blossoms upon the grass… and deep reflections in the dark still water.  Tranquility.  I open my eyes to admire the flush of youth and innocent optimism in the plump freshness of the blooms.  So much hope and promise there!

And tomorrow… as the weight of morning dewdrop and gravity… and the passing of time weighs heavily on them… I will remember today.  Then happily move on.   And over the days to come… I will stop to appreciate the rich deep fragrance that only develops with age.   And the potential for joy that each moment of life can hold.

If only we might grasp it.

Youth is wasted on the young…(smiles)

And now the story… dredged from the family archive. This is reality internet at it’s debateable best folks… (laughs)

Please enjoy!

Cartoon Pen & Watercolour 8″ x 12″ Copyright 2008 Jean Burman

The billy cart stood at the ready… perched precariously at the top of the sloping driveway which pointed down in a jagged line toward the street 250 metres below. I eyed the contraption… anxiously noting the flimsy build-quality… it’s plastic seats barely hanging by the last thread on the screws which “secured” them to the thick sheet of ply that was the cart’s chassis.

The “billy” had foot-controlled steering “secured” with a rope… and bicycle hand brakes fitted on each side of the drivers seat… (not that they actually worked all that well).  But the piece de resistance… were the billy cart’s flash side mirrors… and four freewheeling 14 inch spoked bicycle wheels!

They were prone to buckling… everyone knew that. Especially around corners… when the full weight of passengers was forced onto the two opposing wheels. Many a bent up and badly twisted wheel had to be replaced after the long haul back up the hill at the conclusion of some of the cart’s (shall we say) less than successful (but no less spectacular) runs!

Thoughts of what I knew to be true about that billy cart ran through my mind the afternoon my 10 year old son pleaded with me to “come for a ride on the billy… pleeeease Mum?”

I smiled… arms crossed firmly across my chest. Uh-huh… like THAT was going to happen any time soon… (grin)

Childhood Hero Day got me thinking.  As a mother I have never particularly regarded myself as a hero. But looking back over the years of mothering children I feel fairly confident in saying I was no shrinking violet either. I did my time like other mothers on the frontline of defence for my kids. Back then it seemed like the only thing to do… and I don’t regret a minute of it!

In many ways… I guess we are heroes to our kids… even if ever so inadvertently!  Mum is the person who can fix anything… from a skinned knee… to a science project that just won’t stay stuck.

For my part… those were the days that I learned to become militant in my approach to “pretty much everything”.   And even after all the years… the “activist” label still sticks for better or worse in the hearts and minds of my kids!

It would seem I did have guts afterall! (laughs)

But in looking back… no experience large or small could have prepared me for “the ride of my life” that day on the billy cart!  Whatever possessed me to take up the challenge I can’t say. But I suspect it had something to do with showing them I was made of the “right stuff”.

Then before you could snap your fingers and say “silly woman”… there I was… bike helmet strapped firmly in place and perched precariously on the back of that flimsy cart waiting for the signal to go.   My young son was at the wheel (well okay there was no wheel… but he WAS holding onto the rope)… and I realise this may sound perverse… but I trusted him.   He had afterall done this many times before hadn’t he?

And I could be as brave as he thought I was… umm… couldn’t I?

Andrew (age 10) and Chris (age 13) on the Billy

Finally his best friend (and co conspirator in the billy cart venture) gave the nod… and with a push we were off.  I remember the girls then aged 8 and 6… their faces bright with excitement as we flew past them out the gate and down the driveway gathering speed at a great rate of knots.   The concrete passed quickly beneath us as the billy cart picked up even more speed… and the full realisation of how silly a decision this was for a control freak like me flashed through my mind.

Palm trees lined our driveway all the way to the bottom… and they were now passing us by in a blur. I clung on for dear life as the billy got airborn over the first bump… and then the second… and ran on down the hill wheels whirring in the wind. All I could think about (between screaming my lungs out and wondering how much skin I was going to lose) … was the awful flexing of those 14″ spokes… as we swerved to miss that last palm tree by just centimetres… before taking the final sweeping turn onto the vacant block of land at the bottom of the hill!

I was seeing stars as the billy cart came to a halt in the long grass of the vacant block… and relief swept over me in an instant. My first thought… I’m alive!   My second… get me off this thing … NOW!

Oddly enough… that was the day that my reputation as “hero” was (rightly or wrongly) set in stone!   All I can say about that is “God bless my kids”… that despite the shameless display of cowardice… and whilst totally freaked out and screaming her lungs out… they still thought their mother was “pretty cool”.

And that’s pretty cool in itself isn’t it?

Aren’t kids great?  ~grin~

Well… until they turn 14 anyway… (((chuckles)))

EPILOGUE

The billy cart met with an untimely demise.  Just like little Jackie Paper had done all those years before in Puff… Chris (3 years older than Andrew) grew up… and the billy cart made way for other toys.  Chris’ younger brother Scott then took up his seat.

The billy took it’s final run with Andrew,  Scott and the dog on board… on the sloping bitumen of Park Street right outside his house.  What really happened that day I can’t say.  It wasn’t my watch.  But the story goes… the dog jumped off… the billy cart slewed… the wheel came off… the billy crashed… and both kids were dumped face first onto the road.   The dog hasn’t been seen since… (just kidding!)

Multiple stitches ensued… and a brand new front tooth for Andrew.  The billy was dispatched to where all good billy carts go when they die… wherever that is.   I didn’t want to know.  LOL

Childhood Hero Day is June 13 and Megan at Imaginif suggested bloggers might like to post an article (or story) ahead of time… to bring attention to the day… and awareness to the fact that kids everywhere need… now more than ever… heroes in their lives!

I have written both… an article… and a story (dredged from the depths of the family archive! laughs) which I shall post next time. But for now… the article (and of course… the cartoon!)

Cartoon Pen & Watercolour Copyright 2008 Jean Burman

A recent report “Children’s Fears, Hopes and Heroes - Modern Childhood in Australia” surveyed 600 10 - 14 year olds… and revealed that kids today believe they have much to worry about!

It turns out that:

52% of children are scared that there will not be enough water in the future

44% of children are worried about the future impacts of climate change

43% of children are worried about pollution in the air and water

A third of children are anxious about terrorism.

And a staggering one in four believe that the world will end before they have the chance to grow up!

Add to this concerns of… bullying… obesity… thinness… self image… peer pressure… and acceptance… along with the day to day “stuff” of growing up in the fast pace of modern life (sometimes in environments burdened by excessive financial and emotional hardship)… and there you have it… one gargantuan block of issues to worry about!

What can we adults be thinking? (And by adults I mean all of us… not just parents but also the greater community)

Why do we burden them so?

Childhood just has to be a time when children can simply “be children”!

If not then… then when?

They need us now more than ever to buffer their experiences… to listen to them… (and really hear)… to love them… to shelter and protect them… and to be there to tell them that everything’s going to be okay!

And it will be okay.

Despite the doomsday bleatings of the press… and despite the worrying trends of a world which seems at times to be spinning dangerously out of control… and despite the many and varied modern day issues (some of them serious) that children face today… they WILL be okay.

Just as long as we are there for them… 100%… and they know it…no matter what!

Cartoon Copyright 2008 Jean Burman

It’s a funny old world we live in. And the people in it are even funnier. Take a look at this clip produced by Improv Everywhere. I love the experiments in human behaviour that these guys come up with… but this one was especially entertaining.

A week away in the big smoke… visiting my youngest daughter… has served as an amusing reminder that people are the same wherever you go!

Human behaviour is still human behaviour… in pretty much everyone’s language.

It’s been a wonderful (if exhausting) week of sitting in cafes… cruising the shops… waiting in queues… and sitting patiently in traffic gridlock… providing a great opportunity to take time out to simply observe the passing parade!

All this time out for observation however… (along with time at last to read Dan Ariely’s terrific book “Predictably Irrational - the hidden forces that shape our decisions”) … has left me once again with more questions than answers… and if anyone can help me out with any of these you are more than welcome to it! ((chuckles))

Random questions to ponder:

Why is it that complete strangers can become firm friends in a matter of minutes when thrown together into some unexpected or unusual circumstance?

Why is it that none of us wants to be the first table seated in an otherwise empty restaurant… preferring instead to fall into line like sheep and queue for an hour outside the one next door… just in case (safety in numbers and all that!)

Why is it that we can’t make up our mind which one we want… until someone else wants it. Then we know exactly what we want… and that’s the one they want - of course! ~grin~

Why is it that “free” is so appealing… even when it’s something we don’t want… don’t need… and more than likely can’t use?

Puzzling isn’t it?

Why even in politics the concept of “free” takes on dubious significance. Despite knowing that there is no such thing as a free lunch… why is it that so many voters almost invariably succumb to the promise of “freebies” in the lead up to an election? Whatever happened to “ask not what your country can do for you?” *wink*

Equally puzzling and no less astonishing… is the predictably irrational way in which voters decide on future leaders… allowing popular opinion and coercive persuasion by a manipulative press to shape their decisions and dictate the country’s entire future political direction! Why not simply cut to the chase and elect Rupert Murdoch? ~grin~

Back to things in general… come to think of it… I have always been interested in “why we do the things we do”.

Growing up… one of my favourite television programs was People Are Funny with Art Linkletter. The fact that this program was more than a decade old by the time it arrived on Australian television was totally lost on us! Television was still new… especially in our household… and I enjoyed the funny scenarios that were set up for the unsuspecting participants… along with their very predictable human responses!

It has always puzzled me why so many people don’t seem to know their own mind. And why those who do seem unwilling to share it. And why so many of us are so uncomfortable in our own skin… especially when it comes to making choices.

Why do we choose to simply “blend in” and “fall into line” rather than be seen to be different?

Only a very few are willing to stick their neck out and show the world what they are really made of.

(This is understandable of course… given the “resistance to difference” experienced within the bounds of what’s considered “normal” in human behaviour!)

But wouldn’t it be great?

Just for once?

If people dared to be different… or perhaps even… dared to be “themselves”.

What a wildly interesting… wide and diversified world it would then be!

I know… I know… it ain’t gonna happen…

not anytime soon anyway!

Your comments are always welcome…

Cartoon Copyright 2008 Jean Burman
“Obama Unplugged”

Pen & Watercolour 12″ x 9″

Like most of us… I watched with interest (and considerable empathy) from the sidelines last week as Senator Barack Obama struggled to maintain his equilibrium in the wake of the media fallout from his association and past close friendship with the right Reverend Jeremiah Wright.

Regardless of your politics… it would be difficult not to feel some degree of empathy for a fellow human being under siege from all sides. There is no doubt that he’s in an unenviable position. Damned if you do… damned if you don’t. But this is the way of politics.

Watching the antics of the past week unfolding in the political arena… I began to identify with the exasperation etched on Obama’s face… and it occurred to me that he and I might just have had a thing or two in common last week… and that surprising as it might seem…

Blogging is a lot like politics! [It sure has taught me many things!]

Bloggers (like politicians) must have thick skin.

Bloggers (like politicians) must be prepared to “hear the words they’ve spoken twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools” (to borrow heavily from Kipling! LOL)

Bloggers (like politicians) understand the need to diplomatically “handle” comments that are made (even when some views expressed are diametrically opposed to our own)

Bloggers (like politicians) also e-v-e-n-t-u-a-l-l-y come to understand that the person in “diametrical” opposition… doesn’t necessarily “have it in for them”… they are simply attempting to use someone else’s platform to pump their own agenda [if Wright had wanted the limelight he should have gone into politics himself]

Bloggers (like politicians) know how things can get out of hand… and how in the end… the only reasonable thing to do is to reluctantly and diplomatically put a stop to it. [Obama did this week... and sadly... I am about to]

First though… I’d like to thank each and every one of you who visit my blog in the spirit in which it was intended… offering insights and generously giving encouragement and support for my humble enterprise here. You cannot know the good you do in raising my spirits and encouraging me to blog on!

My blog is my gift to you… the reader.

But remember… it’s a free service [grin] … dredged from the depths of my heart! It is not without fault… (no-one’s perfect). And you don’t have to agree with it. But I mean no harm to anyone. I wish only good for the earth… and good things for the people who walk upon it.

What I ask in return… is that your (very welcome) comments remain relevant to the topic… and more importantly… do not overly contradict the writer! It is understood that everyone has a differing point of view… and I love to hear it. I would be the first to acknowledge that our views should never be static… and to be healthy… should “bend and meld” under the influence of new information.

But… I have no wish for my blog to become my whipping post either. A place where my viewpoint is routinely contradicted and I am forced to defend each word. Where on earth is the fun in that?

Besides… this blog is first and foremost about the craft of writing. Clearly I am still learning… (aren’t we all?)

It is also about the art (and the cartoons)… which I have come to enjoy doing more and more. The issues raised are naturally those that are close to my heart… the things I care about and want to share… but they are not the most important thing. When it’s all said and done… they are just the vehicle for the writing itself… and almost always an afterthought for the cartoons!

Now… please don’t make of this that you should stop commenting. On the contrary… I would like nothing better than for even more people to join in the discussion adding richness to the mix. But please remember I am just a human person. The pays nothing to write home about and the hours are long. So be kind okay? [grin]

I hope you enjoy the cartoon…